Ye your course have run,
Comrades of the Rifle! Spite of drenching rain,
Spite of cold “Authority, ” Ye’ve contrived to gain
A sound and strong “majority. ” Bravo, N. R. A.,
Twenty-One to-day!
Here’s your long survival
Of official snubbing!
May you give each rival
Amicable drubbing!
Here’s to scores improved! Averages bigger!
Nerves by strife unmoved
Fingers firm on trigger! Health! my N. R. A. Twenty-One to-day!
Fig for phrases fine!
Accents Ciceronian!
Brim the cup with wine!
Ranges Wimbledonian, May ye be this year
Delugeless, sun-litten,
While, with hearty cheer,
Punch, and every Briton, Drink “The N. R. A.
Twenty-One to-day! ”
A GREAT UNWASHED.
Me. Forester, the other night, was very anxious to know what the scaffolding at the Clock Tower had cost, what it was for, and when it would be down.
Mr. Adams, in giving him the information he asked for, said that the cost would he £250, that the scaffolding would be down this week, and that it had been put up for the purpose of cleaning the outside of the Clock — which tells to the eye what the tongue of Big Ben proclaims to the ear — the flight of time over the head of Parlia
ment. When Mr. Adams added that this is the first time the Clock has had its face and hands washed since it was put up, he stated what, in these sanitary days, should have startled the House.
Is there any Westminster street-Arab in so neglected a condition as to that cleanli
ness which is next to godliness, as the Clock to which not only the Collective Wisdom but the western portion of the Great Babylon looks for the time of day?
Let us hope the hands of Parliament are cleaner than those of its Clock, and that such great unwashedness is for the present not allowed to penetrate farther than the Clock Tower, where, en attendant, it may be said to have had a recent representative in Mr. Beadlaugh.
“LA CLOTURE’’ — ENGLISH AND ORIGINAL.
Much: sensation has been excited by the daring act of the Board-School teacher who, the other day, sealed, with a strip of stick
ing-plaster, the lips of one of her pupils “who would not leave off talking. ”
Oh, if that school teacher’s original and effective remedy could but be introduced,
by the authority of the Speaker, into the House of Commons!
To be sure, the world would very soon he short of sticking-plaster.
But, think how much the most efficacious form this would be of “La Cloture” which
everybody wants, and nobody apparently dares ask for!
Imagine the Home-Rule heads each in its sticking-plaster!
What plaster half so likely to heal the sores and raws of Ireland!
WHAT WILL THEY DO WITH IT? Dear Me. Punch,
It has come at last, and from a very great distance. All have heard of it, read of it, and many of us have dreaded to know more about it. It has been in print for an indefinite time, but only within the last few days have certain personages, and those the highest in the realm, received a proof of it. Long but a name in this country, it is now amongst us, a
splendid reality. It has appeared in the very last place where it might have been expectedin the Court Circular. To prevent further suspense, be it known that Her Majesty the Queen, and H. R. H. the Prince of Wales, are at this moment each the happy possessor of a “White Elephant. ” From Siam.
p. S. — Her Majesty and the Prince, after mature consideration, have decided not to send their White Elephants to the Zoological Gardens, but to keep them in boxes, and occasionally to show them in public.
A Rara Avis (in Epping Forest). — A “Wayz-Goose. ”
A LITTLE JESUIT.
Son and Heir. “Ma’, I wish you wouldn’t leave me alone with Baby, ’cause I have TO EAT ALL THE JAM, AN’ ORANGES, AN’ CAKES AN’ THINGS TO AMUSE HER!! ”
Comrades of the Rifle! Spite of drenching rain,
Spite of cold “Authority, ” Ye’ve contrived to gain
A sound and strong “majority. ” Bravo, N. R. A.,
Twenty-One to-day!
Here’s your long survival
Of official snubbing!
May you give each rival
Amicable drubbing!
Here’s to scores improved! Averages bigger!
Nerves by strife unmoved
Fingers firm on trigger! Health! my N. R. A. Twenty-One to-day!
Fig for phrases fine!
Accents Ciceronian!
Brim the cup with wine!
Ranges Wimbledonian, May ye be this year
Delugeless, sun-litten,
While, with hearty cheer,
Punch, and every Briton, Drink “The N. R. A.
Twenty-One to-day! ”
A GREAT UNWASHED.
Me. Forester, the other night, was very anxious to know what the scaffolding at the Clock Tower had cost, what it was for, and when it would be down.
Mr. Adams, in giving him the information he asked for, said that the cost would he £250, that the scaffolding would be down this week, and that it had been put up for the purpose of cleaning the outside of the Clock — which tells to the eye what the tongue of Big Ben proclaims to the ear — the flight of time over the head of Parlia
ment. When Mr. Adams added that this is the first time the Clock has had its face and hands washed since it was put up, he stated what, in these sanitary days, should have startled the House.
Is there any Westminster street-Arab in so neglected a condition as to that cleanli
ness which is next to godliness, as the Clock to which not only the Collective Wisdom but the western portion of the Great Babylon looks for the time of day?
Let us hope the hands of Parliament are cleaner than those of its Clock, and that such great unwashedness is for the present not allowed to penetrate farther than the Clock Tower, where, en attendant, it may be said to have had a recent representative in Mr. Beadlaugh.
“LA CLOTURE’’ — ENGLISH AND ORIGINAL.
Much: sensation has been excited by the daring act of the Board-School teacher who, the other day, sealed, with a strip of stick
ing-plaster, the lips of one of her pupils “who would not leave off talking. ”
Oh, if that school teacher’s original and effective remedy could but be introduced,
by the authority of the Speaker, into the House of Commons!
To be sure, the world would very soon he short of sticking-plaster.
But, think how much the most efficacious form this would be of “La Cloture” which
everybody wants, and nobody apparently dares ask for!
Imagine the Home-Rule heads each in its sticking-plaster!
What plaster half so likely to heal the sores and raws of Ireland!
WHAT WILL THEY DO WITH IT? Dear Me. Punch,
It has come at last, and from a very great distance. All have heard of it, read of it, and many of us have dreaded to know more about it. It has been in print for an indefinite time, but only within the last few days have certain personages, and those the highest in the realm, received a proof of it. Long but a name in this country, it is now amongst us, a
splendid reality. It has appeared in the very last place where it might have been expectedin the Court Circular. To prevent further suspense, be it known that Her Majesty the Queen, and H. R. H. the Prince of Wales, are at this moment each the happy possessor of a “White Elephant. ” From Siam.
p. S. — Her Majesty and the Prince, after mature consideration, have decided not to send their White Elephants to the Zoological Gardens, but to keep them in boxes, and occasionally to show them in public.
A Rara Avis (in Epping Forest). — A “Wayz-Goose. ”
A LITTLE JESUIT.
Son and Heir. “Ma’, I wish you wouldn’t leave me alone with Baby, ’cause I have TO EAT ALL THE JAM, AN’ ORANGES, AN’ CAKES AN’ THINGS TO AMUSE HER!! ”